Health Update: Friday, August 26, 2011

I had my second chemotherapy treatment yesterday.  Two down, and four more to go!  I keep reminding myself that each step gets me closer to this all being over, me being healthy and back to myself again.  Yesterday, when I got home, I had my daughter shave my head.  I never thought that I would be asking her to do that or anyone else for that matter.  How life surprises you at times.  My hair was falling out and getting on everything, I was leaving a trail of DNA everywhere that I went,  not to mention that it itched so terribly that I could not stand it.  It has been falling out since last weekend--another reality check.  It looks funny now, but feels much better!  I realized a few things about having no hair: 

(1) My head is whiter than my butt is – I know that may be TMI, 

(2) I never realized that my head would get so cold without hair,

(3) Now, I must worry about sun burning my bare head along with the rest of my body, and

(4) Think of all the shampoos and conditioners that I won't need for a while, and no down time to do my hair when I leave to go somewhere -- I have hats and a wig now!

(5) I do not see the baldness, unless I look in the mirror, so the cute hats, etc. will help a great deal in seeing me as others do (so they have been telling me), beautiful, sexy and strong. 

 

Having said that last part, it is a heck of a time to get my ‘sexy’ back.  However, it would be nice to feel that way about myself again.  I need to get that confident redhead back so that maybe, just maybe, I can find that someone who is my other half.  In the future, that is … not right now though, when I am dealing with so much.  If he is out there, he will just have to wait for me to get my ‘sexy’ and my confidence in the woman that I am back!  Hang in there; I am worth the wait!

  

Academically speaking, I am taking some time off school, just to see how the next few weeks will go and give myself time to recover and just be myself dealing with cancer and chemotherapy.  I love all the people who are on my side, sending me good thoughts along with their love; please -- do not stop!  It helps and I do need it, even though I am a confident bald woman now.  Think of me often and send me your prayers, best wishes and love!  

Remember to live, do not simply exist!

Learn something new each day!

Listen, especially to the silent things people do not or cannot say!

Laugh until you cry, and most of all,

Love for all it is worth!

CONNIE*